Del 2: Kaotisk i Bergen

Bergen (NRK/NTB): Det oppstod full forvirring ved Bryggen da en u-båt la til uanmeldt ved middagstider i dag. Det man først trodde var hurtig respons fra regjeringen viste seg i ettertid å være en nyinnvestering ved Universitetet.

Det var ved 13-tiden i dag at vårt hovedkontor på hemmelig adresse på Nygårdshøyden fikk melding fra vår utegåendereporter at en U-båten hadde lagt til i Vågen, men at Igor fremdeles ikke var å oppdrive til intervju. Det var derfor lenge stor tvil om hvilke U-båt det var snakk om og Dræggen Battalion mobiliserte 1. regiment og la en jernring mellom skuelystene og u-båten. Da fiskeriminister Helga Pedersen (Ap) i går offentliggjorde planen om å heve U-864 utenfor Fedje ble det fra enkelte overivrige sjeler i desken og Bergen AP jublet over APs hurtige behandling og ekspedering av saken.

Da Bevegelsen anser seg selv som miljøbeviste, sosialt ansvarlige og som en nødvendighet for å skape pluralisme i det aktive bergenske selskapslivet ble en deligasjon utnevt av et spontant kommisjonsmøte. Da deligasjonen ankom Bryggen kunne de hurtig bekrefte at det var snakk om den kongelige Norske Marines S-300 "Ula" som hadde gått til havn, og ikke den lagt mer kjente U-864. Kort tid etter ankom representanter for det Revolisjonære fakultet stedet og tilsnakket en tilfeldig, ikke organisert, politimann som omgående fikk fjernet folkemassen. Gjennom vår mann i det Revolusjonære Fakultets politbyrå har vi fått opplyst at U-båten nå er i akademisk tjeneste og er fakultetets eiendom. Det er i samarbeid med Institutt for Markedsfundamentalisme at RF sammen med en mekler har overbevist Forsvarsledelsen om å delprivatisere U-båtflåten, slik at Forsvaret kan spare penger på å sette driften av de forskjellige u-båtene ut på anbud. RF har gjennom sitt investeringsselskap, Omfordelingssamvirket, driftrettighetene frem til 2015.

Vår mann kunne opplyse om at som en del av kvalitetsreformen vil RF nå satse på å gå dypere inn i den revolusjonære lære. Derfor satser de nå på å utvikle en undervannbevegelse som kan spesialiseres i de samfunnsomveltende fag og vil i tillegg til tradisjonell revolusjonær aktivitet og deklassering av herskende klasser også spesialiseres i å styrte grasrota om nødvendig, opplyser vår entusiastiske informant. Gjennom læreplaner som Bevegelsen har tilgang på planlegger RF utover våren å skolere den hysebestanden som måtte befinde seg mellom Wyville Thomson-ryggden og norsk sokkel i Nordsjøen og organisere en revolusjon mot de herskende fiskeflåter som gjennom illegitime (i fiskens øyne) grenser imperiemaktene har tegnet over deres områder og skapt kunstige etniske og artmessige minoriteter i deres kjerneområder. Dette vil i første omgang ramme Helga Pedersen, Fiskebåtredernes Forbund og ledelsen i Kystpartiet.

Part One: Remember the 14 Martys and their Equals.

Today we remember the day innocence died in the streets of Derry. Today it is 27 years since those daring raising their voice against internment without trial; systematic gerrymandering to limit the minority’s right to have a say in matters concerning them self and discrimination from the authorities where met with barb wires and bullets. Today is the anniversary for Bloody Sunday, a day that never should be allowed to be forgotten as most European democracies are turning dangerously close to abolish the habeas corpus in the struggle for safety. The “Under Siege” mentality -which usually is to be found in the most hardcore Protestant parts of Belfast- should not be allowed to get a grasp among us, as unarmed 17 year old boys shot in the back way too easy may characterized as a “terrorist” and who’s death saluted as a victory for the democracy. This is the day to remember, not only the 14 men in Derry, but also all of those still in struggle for achieving the same goals as the NICRA and the Republican Movement did fight for in the North.

To those people still in struggle for self-determination and for the rights and natural laws that every humans are in possession of; the Basques, the Palestinians, to the Tamils, the Tibetans and Kurds, and all other peoples fighting repression, occupation and imperialism; Our Day Will Come!

Crisis solved?

As mentioned last time I had some expectations to the Cabinet’s financial rescue of the industries in general and the other enterprises in particular. As the media tends to turn towards apocalyptic scriptures when describing the current economic situations; things are terribly wrong in Norway, and if we can’t turn it we’re soon on the same level as Moldavia, regarding matters of development. Hence, it was quite a relief to hear that the Finance Minister stated that Norway compared with many other countries are better equipped to rise to the challenge of the present situation. That’s positive, I mean, somebody in the public sphere are actually able to point out that things isn’t that bad up here. Sadly enough, Ireland (together with Iceland and the UK) where mentioned in her speech as an example of economic breakdown, to which I couldn’t agree more, and that did in fact save the legitimacy to the rescue program. (Had they acknowledged a larger crisis would only have led to riots in the opposition).

However, my negative predictions on how the program would be met by the Enterprises, Industries, Opposition and others; it did hit. Mostly. However, my lack of faith in the representatives of that part of the society that’s more loyal to the Chicago School of Economics and other more modified monetary ideologies then the Community, for once seems to have been a bit too deep:

- The Liberals and Christ-Democrats where quite more positive then I had expected. Especially the Liberals did point out that there was a lack of support for the exporting industries, which we all could agree with. But in general they saluted the program.

- The Conservatives do, not surprisingly, focus on the lack of support for the exporting industries, and the fact that there’s been no tax cuts the last 3 and a half years. That’s the thing with Conservatives, if they can’t have their tax cuts once a year; they probably starve to death, at least they get some real headache. But that’s all. They have the habit of complaining about financial stuff that only makes them less and less attractive as a party (they were crushed in the last election by the Liberals and the Progressives). The continual demands for tax cuts, god times as bad times, won’t help them. They only manage to make them self appear as a whiny upper class. But, it should be mentioned that they in some matters were surprisingly positive.

- The Progressives, well, in a parody of the current opposition some weeks ago they were all compared with a flock of gulls screaming “too little, too late”. Today the party leader stated that the program came too late, and were too small. That’s all I have to say. By the way; I just read that they, who don’t acknowledge the climate changes, that the program isn’t green enough.

- When it comes to the Enterprise Confederation it was remarkably only the lack of flexibility (lack of social dumping) in the labour market, but that’s the regular answer to everything for them. However, that the leadership did acknowledged that most of the program would be helpful to handle the crisis. That’s a craick. Even one of the country’s richest men and perhaps one of the most tasteless men as well, did praise it. They whined over the lack of tax cuts, but that’s life.

You never stop learning.

The answer to the Crisis is here:

Just a few thoughts less then an hour before the publication of the Government’s rescue program to revitalize the economy. For the very first, it is a hard economic situation, but there’s still no deep crisis as we do not face collapse in the tax revenues, there’s still plenty of resources to distribute to pensions, the health system are fully operative; but most important: there’s no problems of mass unemployment. I saw some numbers from Ireland only some days ago were the unemployment rate were dangerously close to 8 %, thus our 2,5 % is merely what we have to expect. However, everyone is talking about their expectations to the Red-Green’s aid programme and this is my guess for how it will be received by the Opposition, the economic elites, the Unions and so on:

- The Progressive will never ever by positive to anything.
- The Conservatives will properly be satisfied with some of the tax cuts for the industries.
- The Liberals, I’ll think, will be satisfied with the focus development in the infrastructures.
- The Christ Democrats would properly be some negative to most of the program, but will –I guess- endorse anything that would seems like rehabilitation on Churches, schools and homes for the elderly.
- The Trade Unions, rather, THE Union, have enough influence on the Labour that they know they are the part win most gains, but will probably make some protest just for stating that they are not a part of the government and that they still expect something.
- The Enterprise Confederation will be angry. Angry and disappointed. They will start complaining on the lack of competition, the lack of free marked mechanisms, then they will join the Progressive and complain about the high taxation of the upper classes that they are robbed for values and due to the following depression won’t be able to create anything at all. I guess. It’s the usual; in darker as in brighter days.

In general: nobody is fully satisfied, and the complaining will continue even as Norway are more stable and fortunate in its economical structures then most of the other countries involved in this crisis.

Wir hat es gemacht!

Today I had planned to contribute to give the Israeli authorities even more negative comments on the web, but, honestly; their worldwide reputation are already quite tarnished. The recent war crimes will hopefully not disappear from our common memory in wile; hence a personal break from the conflict would not lead to any major changes. It would probably just give me some more time to get into the facts and some wider overview in the situation as it seems like the political conflict within Knesset so far only are breaking the surface.

Now, to something more constructive.

Yesterday, after a hard fought victory against FYRO Macedonia I were of that opinion that we won because of determination and not because of the skills; that the Macedonian streght where in the audience in form of body fluids and coins, and that Germany were something way stronger. And they were. However, we rose to the task and we fought, and we, despite the odds, won. It's bloody unbelievable. We have just beaten Germany –the world cup holders- with a single goal 25:24. I had my doubts. I did fear some 10 goals defeat as the German players are some of the best in the world, and their team as a unit: as close as you may come to invincible.

I know quite good that it in 9 out of 10 matches would have gone in another way, but the last seconds, even the misses went in our favour this nite. The 10 last seconds were spoiled by some technical fouls in both direction, first by a Norwegian ball that went to a throw-in, then by foul throwing from the Germans. Perhaps not the fairest way of winning a match, as I personally would preferred either a last second save then a win on something technical. However, a win is a win! There’s still a hope for a semi final as we perhaps may beat Poland, and Denmark beating Germany. The last result less likely. But, still a chance!

I’m usually not a person who makes big deals out of sports results, but this, beating Europe’s best national team. It needs to be mentioned. And celebrated as 24: Redeption, a fantastic comment to the American hypocracy in their politics abroad (at least as it was during Bush's presidency), are running.

Obama gikk i svart!

Bergen/Kronstad (NTB/RTE): Det ble rapportert om opprivende scener i en av Bergens forstader under innsettelsen av Barack Obama (Dem) som ny amerikansk president. Kort tid etter at Elizabeth Alexander med sin visuelt sterke, dog noe surealistiske, poesi hadde skremt vekk 32,7 millioner TV-seere globalt fikk Obamas administrasjon en knallstart.

Dublinkorrespondenten hadde på vegne av Havarikommisjonen sammen med Scaramouche kallt inn til markering av George W. Bushs periode som president og ville i det høvet markere regimeskiftet med en flaske champagne av merket Jeanmarie Sec á Epernay. Åpningssermonien ble derimot radikalt forandret da trykket inne i flasken hadde oversteget det Norske Vinmonopols ambefalte grenseverdi og forårsaket den største eksplosjonen i Bergen i nyere etterkrigshistorie. Korken brøt ut av munningen og gikk i en krass parabolisk bane før den etter sammenstøt med taket gikk over i en Bezierkurve og torpederte en bokhylle og rammet Statskanalen, som med hjelp av deler av flaskens innhold, kortsluttet apparatet etter sterk katalytisk aktivitet ved spolekjernen. Området ble raskt ryddet og Havarikommisjonen var tilstedet allerede under ulykken og gikk straks i gang med etterforskningen.

Professor II -Pascal Hertz- ved Elektromagnetisk Institutt ved Universitetet i Bergen uttalte gjennom en pressemelding fra Bevegelsen at trykket i flasken må ha vært på sterke 4500 MmHg, eller 88 psi. Da champagnen holdt 5 grader og hadde 12% styrke da den kom i kontakt med fokuseringsspolen forstyrret dette magnetfeltet mot bilderøret slik at det slo ut full fluks som vanskliggjorde videre induksjon og apparatet gikk omgående i svart selv om lyden overraskende nok steg noen hertz.

Da Dublinkorrespondenten etter basketaket med Midlandskorrespondenten under en Anglo-Irsk interessekonflikt forrige helg ble oppgradert til en signifikant terrortrussel av Politiet i Hordaland reagerte Secret Service spontant da den løpske korken rammet TV-bildet bare 34 sekunder etter at Obama forlot det. En gruppe ble sendt til adressen og beslag prosjektil (kork) og det 7hWb sterke magnefeltet (apparatet) som begge kunne forvolde skade på amerikanske interesser da Dublinkorrespondenten nå brøt med Faradays lov og normal folkeskikk. Senere samme kveld ble adressen også oppsøkt av en representant fra Statskanalen som skulle ha seg frabedt systematiske undervurderinger av Statskanalens makt ved å angripe kanal 2 i beste sendetid og skrev ut dobbel lisens på stedet. Trafikken fløt som normalt ved 2-tiden, men opprydningen fortsatte likevel utover morgentimene.

Hissig gjensyn

Kalfaret (NRK/RTE/BBC): Det kom til munnhuggeri med påfølgende slengbemerkninger og brudd på Genevekonvensjonen da Bevegelsen natt til søndag var samlet i Ole Irgens' Vei, Bergen. Anledningen var konstitueringsmøtet for the Royal Norwegian Correspondance Assosiation, en ny tenketank og sosial klubb for tidligere utenrikskorrespondenter.

Det var under pk. 1 på dagsorden "Godkjennelse av innkallelse" at de ideologiske friksjonene mellom sekretæren, den tidligere Dublinkorrespondneten, og møtelederen, den tidligere Midlandkorrespondneten, at stemningen ble i overkant emmosjonell. På innkallelsen ble det understreket at møtet også skulle fungere reunion, da Dublinkorrespondenten ikke hadde vært ved Hovedkontoret i Bergen siden august 2008. Dublinkorrespondenten gjorde det da klart at han som motstander av Fellesmarkedet nektet plent å gå videre i saken hvis det kunne medføre personlig suverenitetsavståelse til Bevegelsen. Midlandskorrespondenten kunne da berolige motparten under den påfølgende spørretimen at en godkjenning av innkallelsen ikke ville få noen konsekvenser for deltakernes forhold til hverandre på andre områder enn de regulert av Bevegelsens statutter og understreket at samtalene var bilaterale, og at begge parter når som helst kunnen nekte å svare den andre under samtalene selv om forespørslen var aldri så velmenende og høflige.

Konsensus opphørte derimot bare få minutter senere da Dublinkorrespondenten etter sitt foredrag "Fra Derry til Rekyjavik: -En reise i det britiske demokratiets prinsipper" fra arrangørens side ble tilbydd et leskende glass med eldret brent bygg, vann, gjær, malt og humle, som etter blanding hadde opparbeidet seg en karakteristisk laktosesmak, ble servert kjørlig i glass. Da glasset hadde blitt frembrakt og fylt uten noen opprivende scener oppdaget Dublinkorrespondenten at pappbrikken under glasset var utformet som et engelsk flagg med inskripsjonen "For England and St.George!". Spontant gikk Dublin på offensiven og serverte arrangøren et kraftig lyskespark mens han skrek "For Ireland and St. Patrick". Situasjonen eskalerte og kom ut av kontroll og endte i håndgemeng etter at Midlandkorrespondenten på veiene av gulvet (the Floor)kom i skade for å be om presisering om hvem St Patrick var. Situasjonen roet seg noe da Midlandkorrespondenten etter en serie beinkroker med skjult hook truet med de Progressive fra talerstolen under den påfølgende budsjettdebatten. Politimesteren i Hordaland har i ettertid oppgradert trusselnivået til Dublinkorrespondenten til "Elevated" og beklaget ovenfor Midlands at CS-gass og Finn Abrehamsen ikke kom da politiet innenfor dagens rammebetingelser ikke tør å gå ut alene etter mørkets frambrudd. I en kort kommentar har Dublin til Bevegelsens utsending understreket at hans forhold til regresjonsanalyse er noe uheldig og at den eneste som kan ha glede med å få han stemplet som "signifikant" må være Midlands, som førte opp T-verdien på årets selvangivelse som skattefradrag.

Political frustrations and Academical progress

Finally, after a slow start in this semester lacking courses, subjects and plans; today some hours with heroic fights against a non-cooperative bureaucratic system I ended up with specialization in Newer History, and for the first time I do look forward to get started. Not to be cruel against the History classes her in Bergen, but, from time to time you just want to run out of the lecture theatre during the break or even during the lecture, run to the Football Pub bring on a Rosenborg/Vålerenga jersey and start mocking the drunk Brann fans just so they may knock me down so I at least may feel that I’m alive. The Introduction course lectures were in my view a bloody parody on a dry dust collecting band of nobodies. It should be unnecessary to say that students in their early-mid twenties discussing which papers should be handed in for getting EXTRA social welfare in addition to the study loan. But, today I was granted place in the Specialization Class, with focus on...Irish History 1850 – 2000. Only knowledge demanded in advance: Able to understand English, and already be a student at the University. Beat that. Half year residence in Dublin, and already past a exam in Irish Political History. Beat that. Irish History and Irish Politics (Sinn Féin) another semester; I think I may live with that. Erin go Bragh!

Without this positive turning in my academic environment I took my first step into something that might be looked at as something close to a political statement as I joined the EU-Sceptic Movement. First political association and the Reason who made me tip over the edge: the liberalization of the Post Service. Perhaps unproblematic, but as most of EU’s economical foundation the belief that the common good emerges when the supply meets the demands are not in our interest in this matter. When the private marked are being allowed to compete with the public they need to put most of their resources where the marked, hence they who use the Post Service, are situated. Let’s look at this in a practical way: Svolvær in Lofoten have about 9.000 inhabitants (the entire municipality), and closest town (of some size) is Narvik, some 3,5 hours away by bus. They do have a airport who may get them to Bodø and Leknes, in addition they’re a harbour for Hurtigruten. That’s all, no direct contact with Southern Norway directly. If some there are going to send a letter to some relatives, say in Kristiansund, think about the costs of that single letter. Then, Lørenskog just outside Oslo with some 30.000 inhabitants with a population density of 450 per square kilometre, then somebody there are going to do the same. Think out those costs differences for the same service. The demands for Post services are, logically, largest in the urban areas, and less in the rural counties. Then two companies are going to compete each other for the costumers: where is the place where you would place your resources: to hold some 9.000 up north with such services, or the 900.000 living around Oslo? Where is the possibility for economic gains? The term A, B and C post suddenly gets a new meaning. Of course some companies may specialize in rural post services, but the lack of quanta will anyway push the prices higher because the costs of running rural a rural post system are much higher than a central one. I guess this problem are much larger in Norway then in most of the EU states; Ireland, Germany, UK, Belgium, the Netherlands, Denmark, Austria..it is geographical small countries with higher population than Norway. It is two different worlds. Therefore it hurts to see how the incumbent government, with the Centre Party (rural agrarians) in front, refuses to veto the EU Post Directive. It’s bloody disillusioning to see how the marked fundamentalism are spreading like a virus through our parties, and it’s bloody provoking to see the Conservatives time after time are proposing to amend the Constitution with support far into the Labour Party lines so it will be easier to enter the Union. You may only wonder why this isn’t looked upon as treason; they are not only demanding to set the rules, they are changing them as it suits them, and it seems like they do not care about the recent poll that told us that the NO side were in front of the YES side with 51 TO 36. I’m tired of just watching Labour continue their treason to the welfare system and the class they are proclaiming to represent. I’m tired of the Pro-European Movement are stealing the “solidarity” term. I’m have had enough of Union propaganda abroad and Union adoration by the elite and their companies and organizations. I’m perhaps only one but it’s time to fight back. Once we have –God forbid (I’m personally a atheist)- lost the referendum in the future, it’s over. Then we “have” to follow Brussels like it or not, I heard the rhetoric in Ireland, and that’s it. If it is class struggle they want, and a total lack of respect for the political system, let them get it, or we may just fight them, the Unionists, off again, and again, and again.

And, I'm not too found of the Israeli demand that we, the Nations who have given Development and Finacial Aid to the Palestine Authorities, are going to pay for the damage caused by the Israeli Army during this campaign. If I have read my history correctly, it was the Jewish people in Germany who had to pay for the damage to their property inflicted by the National Socialists mobs during the Crystal Night. The history repeats itself.

Atter i Bergen

Nesten på dagen fem måneder etter at jeg forlot Bergen, satte jeg igjen mitt åsyn på Vestlandets hovedstad, en mørk januarkveld med tunge skyer og lett regn. Ringen er sluttet. 3 timer senere hanger den katolske tricolouren på kortveggen og jeg må skuffet konstatere at den kjære buska mi utenfor vinduet har blitt kappet ned i løpet av høsten. Den første dagen kom jeg; den andre dagen omgrupperte jeg bagasjen; den tredje dagen var jeg atter på Torgallmenningen. Sit.Rap fra Bergen: store tap av fasader, Bybanen går sin gang, gatene såpass opprevet at gutua hjemme er breiere og fastere i dekke. Bergenserne er seg sjøl; og veldig godt er dét. Bygda står, om enn Maccumba og Nygårsgaten ser noe krigsherja ut, men mot Strømmen ser det derimot på grensen til kontinentalt ut. Godt å være hjemme igjen, sjøl om savnet etter Erinn er der.

Bergen prevales, but Erinn go Braugh.

A Happy New Year.

Happy New Year, guys. First post this year, and also the first in a while. The last weeks in Dublin wasn’t too calm, as I think I did mentioned, which also are the fact for the first week back in Norway. Finally recovered from my Irish cold at Christmas Eve, I spent this last week to mostly voluntarily a series of visits around the icy Inland to relatives of different kinds. Charming. The Tour ended New Years Eve as my friend (and his Charming Housewife), the Movements former Correspondent in Stok-on-Trent, United Kingdom, invited to a Party, Last Nite of the Proms style at his residence outside Oslo. So, a warm greeting to him, “wife”, Ludvig and Soland. Cheers to ye for the best New Years Eve this decade, which in other words means in this decade.

Then, since I for the first time in 10 years haven’t made up any status or rather a post mortem of the year that went over in history two days ago, let’s do that, just for the crack. Since I have a huge faith in the humanity, let’s start with the top 10 disappointments in 2008:
1: The Norwegian Labour Party. – Social Democrats, turncoats: same shite.
2: Israel. – Another year of terror, threats and other forms of Missile Diplomacy.
3: The EU. – Thatcher, Big Brother, Goebbels, Lloyd George and Berlusconi couldn’t do it better.
4: Socialistic Left Party. – More interested in internal struggling and symbols than Socialism.
5: The Economic System. – Work the crap out of you so your bosses may crap on you.
6: UCD’s International Office. –Give me an advisor who really wants to help me.
7: Norwegian Exchange Students. – What’s wrong with ye? It’s allowed to be polite!
8: The Labour Marked (spring). –Why the complaining of too few workers when ye don’t need them?
9: Raufoss. – Still relegated, and little hope beyond that.
10: City of Cork. – A great place to go through. By night. At the Highway.

Feeling slightly better I think I will turn to the top 10 highlights of the year, which compared to the 2007 list are quite more colourful, fairly longer and more memorable:
1: The Bloody Sunday Monument in Derry.
2: To work at Transocean Artic, an oil platform.
3: To finally get to Ireland.
4: Sinn Féin’s, and Libertas’, victory in the Lisbon Treaty Referendum.
5: To finally get to Scotland.
6: The expression in the former Midlands Correspondent’s face at Westminster Bridge in April.
7: To celebrate a sunny May 17th in Bergen as the rest of Norway had the worst weather in 50 years.
8: Belfast (and Edinburgh rocks!)
9: The Wolfe Tone Concert at UCD.
10: The Haggis in Inverness. (And later in Edinburgh)
(11: The Graythwaite Guest House, 106 Lancaster Road, Newcastle-under-Lyme in Staffordshire!)

The top 10 list could easily been made longer, perhaps made into a top 20, and I had a hell of filling all the places in the low 10 list, which are a significant difference from the 2007 record, which is positive, indeed. I would dare to rank it as the best year since 2005, I have no idea how healthy it is to rank your years, but at least then you have something to reach towards, and/or to remember.

Finally, it is not most important to have a lot of different Tops and Lows, but, experiences. Things learned are the only thing from a closed chapter in the History we may carry with us into the New Year, hence:
The Top 10: Things I have learned.
1: After the collapse of Capitalism: the need of Socialists and Communists.
2: After the Irish NO: The People have the abilities to fight the rulers if necessarily.
3: Nihilism isn’t necessarily something bad.
4: Hide symbols in the North, you never know when the UVF are marching.
5: Always bring a photo camera.
6: After the Irish NO: The People’s meaning count for nothing in modern Democracy.
7: Facebook sucks.
8: Expect the unexpected when you don’t need a miracle.
9: French is NOT a world language.
10: Vive la Morte, and keep on.